What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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