What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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