What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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