What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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