What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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