What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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