What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T

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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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