What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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