What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What is a baby's motto?

If at first you don't succeed, cry and cry again!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.

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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda

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