What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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