What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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