What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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