What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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