What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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How many believable, competent, ``just-right-for-the-job'' presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb?

It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it?
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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