What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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