What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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