What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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