What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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