What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang

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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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