What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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