What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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