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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?
Parachute school!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?
New Jersey got to pick first.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?
Me-ow
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?
Every year!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?
To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What washes up on small beaches?
Microwaves.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?
Meat and Democrats!
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?
It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?
What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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