What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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