What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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