What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.

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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).


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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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