What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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