What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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