What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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