What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.

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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky

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