What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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