What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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