What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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