What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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