What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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