What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"

I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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