What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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