What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?

An envelope.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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