What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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