What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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