What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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