What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.

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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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