What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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