What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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