What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!

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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.

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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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