What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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