What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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