What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day

but I couldn't find any.

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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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