What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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