What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Why was the baseball player arrested in the middle of the game?

He was caught stealing second base.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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