What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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