What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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