What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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