What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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