What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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