What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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