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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?
Time to get a new bed
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?
In their Sleevies!
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What is the strongest animal?
A snail because it carries it's home.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?
Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?
"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What do you do when your chair breaks?
Call a chairman.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing
but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?
It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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