What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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