What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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