What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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