What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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