What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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