What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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