What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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