What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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