What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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