What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!

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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.

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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop

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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood

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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!

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