What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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