What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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