What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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