What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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