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What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why did the thief take a shower?
He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
You Poke her face.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?
Donald Trump.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.
Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?
King.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?
They both whine alot!
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What kind of potato chips fly?
Plane ones.
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