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What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
Its shadow
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?
Pointless
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Clowns divorce:
custardy battle.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,
I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.
They keep dropping their trunks.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?
A milkshake
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