What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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