What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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