What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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