What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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