What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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