What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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