What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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