What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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