What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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