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What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?
O I C U R M T
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?
Their personalities.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?
Nice belt!
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?
One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?
Me-ow
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How does a penguin build it's house?
Igloos it together.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?
Camembert.
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