What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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