What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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