What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.

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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.

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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.

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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.

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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!

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