What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder?

he got a little behind in his work.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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