What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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