What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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