What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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