What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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