What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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