What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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