What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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