What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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