What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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