What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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