What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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