What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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