What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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