What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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