What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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