What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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