What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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