What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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