What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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