What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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