What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?

The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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