What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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