What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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