What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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