What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.

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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.

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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.

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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.

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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.

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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.

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