What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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