What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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