What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.

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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story

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