What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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