What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy

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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth

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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g

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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.

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