What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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