What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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