What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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