What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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