What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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