What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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