What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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