What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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How many investment brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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