What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!

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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?

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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.


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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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