What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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