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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?
Super Pickle!
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia!
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?
To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?
One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?
Her New Jersey.
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What do you call a mad elephant?
An earthquake.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?
An Algae-bra
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Why are elephants wrinkled?
Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Which reindeer likes to clean?
Comet
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.
I can hardly contain myself.
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