What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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