What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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