What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis

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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.

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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.

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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story

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