What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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