What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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