What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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