What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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