What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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