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What's green and loud?
A froghorn.
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?
Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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What do you call a mad elephant?
An earthquake.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?
The bucket.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?
Deviled eggs.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?
It might be your bicycle.
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Where do orcas hear music?
Orca-stras
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?
Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta
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