What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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