What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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