What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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