What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.

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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.

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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.

I said, "Are you two an item?"

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