What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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