What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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