What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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