What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.

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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.

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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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