What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.

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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck

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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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