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What's in the middle of nowhere?
The letter H.
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What is a cow's favorite place?
The mooseum.
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What do you call a messy hippo?
A hippopota-mess
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?
Fireballs.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!
If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?
A swordfish
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?
"Feel the World."
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.
With a tuba glue.
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What does GOP stand for?
Grabs Our Pussy.
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