What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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