What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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