What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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