What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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