What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.

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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile

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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.

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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.


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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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