What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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