What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

The fish.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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