What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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