What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.

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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!

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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."

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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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