What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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