What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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