What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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A seal walks into a club...
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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