What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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