What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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