What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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