What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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