What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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