What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?

That depends on the speed of the change and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. It just might be easier to leave the bulb and change the room. It's all relative.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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