What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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