What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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