What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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