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What's the definition of perfect pitch?
When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date
but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?
BaNa2
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?
None, because they were copycats
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What did the clock do after it ate?
It went back four seconds!
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?
He took them to a pignic.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No I deer
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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?
He was a dirty double crosser!
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