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What's the definition of perfect pitch?
When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?
At the ghost-ery store!
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?
Ant-elopes!
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. It turned itself in.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?
She wanted to reach the high notes!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?
A hot dog
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;
I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?
Take your foot off his head.
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What has a head but no body?
A nail.
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