What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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