What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies

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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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