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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?
One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",
he said "Not you again".
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?
Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?
The baaaahamas
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro's number!
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?
They can make little things count.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?
Mice krispies
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Why is b always cool?
Because it's between ac.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?
Because of the bark
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