Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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