Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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