Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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