What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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