What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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