What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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