What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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