What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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