What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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