What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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