What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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