What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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