What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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