What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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