What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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