What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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