What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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