What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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