What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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