What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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