What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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