What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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