What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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