What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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