What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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