What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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