What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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