What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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