What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How many gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What do you call a snarky criminal going down the stairs?

[A Condesending con descending]
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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