What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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