What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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