What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.

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When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!

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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.

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