What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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