What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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