What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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