What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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