What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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