What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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