What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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