What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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