What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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