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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?
After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?
In his trunk
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?
Carlos.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?
Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?
Pupperoni.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?
A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?
Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?
A hot dog
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"
and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?
Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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