What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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