What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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