What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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What's the one thing that never works when it's fixed?

A jury.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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