What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to

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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk

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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan

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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!

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