What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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