What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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