What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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