What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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