What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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