What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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