What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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