What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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