What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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