What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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