What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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