What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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