What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.

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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.

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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!

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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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