What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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