What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How do you know when its Michael Jacksons bed time ?

When the big hand touches the little hand
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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