What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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