What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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