What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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