What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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