What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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